An icon of drag, a beautiful human and a pillar of strength to Sahir House. How can any of us not be affected by the recent passing of The Vivienne.

For many, the whole situation feels surreal, and many of our conversations are around shock, disbelief and of course great sadness. For so many of us the loss feels particularly personal, especially of course around Sahir House and Liverpool. Of course, all of these reactions are a testament to the massive impact The Vivienne had, not just throughout our community, but throughout the UK and beyond.

It’s impossible for us to lose someone held so dear, and not be affected, on many levels.

If you’re struggling at the moment, you may find it helpful to focus on what we can do, even in the face of such loss. While we can’t change what has happened, we can choose how we respond and how we support ourselves and each other.

It’s okay to grieve. Grief is a natural human emotion, and it can manifest in many different ways. There’s no right or wrong way to feel. Some people may experience sadness, anger, confusion, or even disbelief. Allow yourself to feel whatever emotions arise without judgment.

The Vivienne brought joy, laughter, and representation to so many. Their performances and advocacy made a real difference. Focusing on the positive contributions they made can be a helpful way to honour their memory. Think about the moments they made you smile, the times they inspired you, or the messages they shared that resonated with you.

Sharing your feelings with others who understand can be incredibly helpful at times like this. Talk to friends, family, or support groups. Sahir House is here for you, offering a safe and supportive space to connect with others who may be experiencing similar feelings. Don’t hesitate to reach out to us for support.

In solution-focused therapy, we focus on what’s already working well in your life. What strengths and resources have helped you cope with difficult times in the past? How can you draw on those strengths now? Perhaps it’s your resilience, your ability to connect with others, or even your sense of humour.

During times of grief, it’s essential to prioritise self-care. Make sure you’re getting enough rest, eating nutritious food, and engaging in activities that bring you joy and help you relax. This might include spending time in nature, listening to music, or pursuing a hobby.

Remember, grief is a process, and it takes time. Be patient with yourself and allow yourself the space to heal. By focusing on our strengths, connecting with others, and remembering the positive impact The Vivienne had, we can navigate this difficult time together. Sahir House is here to offer support, so please don’t hesitate to reach out if you need someone to talk to.

Love, peace & healing,

Martin